Peanuts or Pretzels?  is a comedic one-minute song for soprano and piano from the perspective of a flight attendant. A video Autumn Allee and my performance at the University of Louisville (April 10, 2013) is below.

Instrumentation:
Soprano, E-Ab5 range, a brief C4
Piano

Duration:
1 minute

Lyrics of “Peanuts or Pretzels?”:
Welcome aboard Flight 9919 to Tuscon.
Our New York-based flight crew welcomes you.
Federal regulations prohibit tampering
with flight attendants.
Peanuts?
If we do a water landing try the backstroke.
Use care when storing small children in the overhead bins
as they may shift during flight.
Pretzels?
Welcome aboard Flight 9919 to Tuscon.
Emergency Exits. Exits.
You may want to use them now.
(c) 2013 music & words by Yvonne Freckmann

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